I guess I could short circuit this entire complaint by just saying my biggest complaint about the new bionic woman show is that it totally, royally sucks. But you deserve more than that. If I just said it sucks, you might be enticed to watch it. I can’t let you do that.
Let me preface this by saying I had an original Six Million Dollar Man doll when I was kid. I know this stuff.
I just sat down to watch it tonight and I had to wait 15 minutes for something bionic. The first 15 minutes of the show seemed to be just another show about a girl, not a woman by any stretch of the imagination. Just some girl who can’t get her head on straight. What a waste. There are a million shows about a girl who can’t get her head on straight.
So the show absolutely sucks. Apparently, it now costs 50 million dollars to replace an ear, eye and legs in a bionic fashion. You would think with that with that much inflation they would at least give her that sound when she did stuff. You know that sound I’m talking about. The bionic sound. It’s not there. At least not yet and I’m 24 minutes into this crappy show and they haven’t done the bionic sound yet.
And that my friends, is my biggest complaint about the new bionic woman - no bionic sound.
Subscribe to chewie
Wow. That sound is what MADE those old shows. When you’d run around pretending to be bionic you would make the sound with your mouth. That “Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch” sound. You have successfully deterred me from watching this show. Thank you for saving me from wasting my time.
It’s bad, it’s soooo effing bad that I turned over to watch Sponge bob Square pants, at least SBSP is entertaining, this is a pile of weasel vomit, MG who thinks up the plots for this sort of stuff, they must live on the planet ZORG, or smoke crack.. , This show is like watching 3 year old bilge water that’s been left to stagnate in the bottom of a rusty old fishing boat, and the fishing boat has been left to rot its life away in a disused harbour in Siberia…
Sorry but its really that crap….
Steve Austin on October 5th, 2007 at 12:29 pm | Link
Don’t forget no slow motion. The original shows were MADE, as DBlock points out, by the sound but the accompanying slow motion shots of jumping over a fence or jumping off a building went hand in hand.
The new bionic woman is opposite in every way. No sound and no slow-mo. In fact everything is sped up. Ground breaking cinematic effects idea - someone’s running fast speed the film up. It’s like the bionic Charlie Chaplan.
Eh, it’s not that bad. I remember the old show, and granted, the new one goes way out on a limb with all the background storyline, but you gotta have that drama to catch the attention of the masses nowadays. Its just the network’s way of keeping up appearances. I do agree though that there needs to be a LOT more asskickin’ goin’ on…
How bad? So bad that in a recent episode the lead character had to pretend to be British. Why is this bad? Well, because the actress is actually British so basically, be yourself. Also the way they have this super-secret govermnet organization doing things is so screwed up. Give me Oscar Goldman! I think its so sad that the actor who played the bad-ass boss in Point of No Return is playing such a wimp this time out. There are only two things in this show. The actress playing the other bionic woman and the interactions between her and her lover (asian guy). The fact that I don’t even know their names is sad and a testament to how bad this show is being done.
The writing stinks, the acting is bad (except for the two I mentioned), the editing is so beyond bad. I don’t think this show is going to make it unless somethings change dramatically.
Philbe on October 25th, 2007 at 8:32 am | Link
In my opinion, new bionic woman more than sucks! It’s down right horrible! Man what a waste of time and film! It truly shows you that the network is as dum as they were back in the day as they are today.By cancelling the Lindsay Wagner’s version. If they ever had brains they should had kept the original Bionic Woman on longer in the 70’s! Cause it really was a cool fun series.Instead they went with stupid family sitcoms. Now some 30 years later they bring it back only to completely alter the entire premise and the real reasons that were logical and made the show an overnight sensation! Granted I was really happy to see a new bionic woman, even though I will forever be loyal to the original! Cause Lindsay Wagner is what made that show work! She had the right everything! I watch the pilot and I fell to the floor in horror! This is such a lame attempt that I didn’t know if I should laugh or cry! I was so very disappointed but I watch the next three episodes in hopes it would somehow be better or it was just all a big joke! I just got more angry, so I decided I wouldn’t torture myself anymore! That was enough! No sound effects? No slow-motion? Universal please release the originals and just leave our classics alone. If you can’t make them just as good with good writing and believeable actors.Then let it be…THANKS FOR NOTHING
vic on June 13th, 2008 at 8:17 pm | Link