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The Corona Marketing Team | My Biggest Complaint
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Random: Lazy Incompetant Employees At AutoZone
File your complaint now

My Biggest Complaint About The Corona Marketing Team


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OKAY, WE GET IT.

Corona wants you to drink on a beach. It’s pretty much common knowledge by now. If you’ve seen even one of their commercials, you are fully aware of this. All of their commercials, by the way, are 95% alike. Let me paint the picture for you.

Beach and sound of the ocean. More beach, more ocean sounds. A little more beach, a little more ocean sounds. Bam! Corona bottle in some pseudo-clever camera angle.

“ooh look, that cruise ship looks like it’s going inside the bottle!”
“oooh look that guy drinking a corona threw his cellphone at the water.”

Hey isn’t that littering? Come to think of it, what do they do with all of those Corona bottles they’re finishing? That’s such a secluded beach, I doubt that there’s even a trashcan nearby. And the drinkers of these Coronas are so “RELAXED” that I doubt they brought a proper trash receptacle with them. So what happens to all of those bottles and bottle caps that they don’t need anymore? I bet that if one were to actually stop drinking Coronas and go into the water, one would find the ocean floor littered with hundreds of Corona bottles and caps.

But my biggest complaint about the Corona Marketing Team is their absolute lack of creativity. How many different ways will you show Corona on a beach? Show me something new with Corona. I’m sick of the beach.

Oh but I do remember ONE slightly original Corona commercial. It’s ancient, but they still play it every year. It’s the Christmas commercial. A small shack on a silhouetted island with palm trees and someone whistling “Oh Christmas Tree”, then the Christmas lights go on in one of the palm trees. But it’s still a beach setting with ocean sounds and no real dialogue.

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10 Comments

  1. I live at the beach. Corona has no idea how hard it is to get a beer on the beach. That might be another complaint all on it’s own, but taking things the way they are… you would probably need one of Corona’s secluded island spots to pull it off as open and notoriously as presented.

    You would have a better shot at hooking up with the hot beer chicks in bikinis on other beer ads like those ads make you think you will than you would sitting peacefully on the beach in a chair with a Corona with waves lapping against your feet.

  2. Those chicks in other beer ads are only so gorgeous because it’s a Beer Goggles simulation. The Coors silver bullet train that turns everything to winter and makes Coors cans magically appear in people’s hands is real life though. Funny how that train never passes by anyone under the age of 21.

  3. There have been plenty of times when beer goggling got me what I thought was a hot beer chick, but no matter how many times I sit in my living room and drink Corona, I never end up with sand on my feet.

  4. The marketing job Corona has done with an absolutely horrible piss-water beer is amazing. Beer and fruit are not meant to go together.

  5. The whole “Corona and Lime” thing started when a bartender realized a slice of lime would keep the flies from landing on his bottle. I find that the lime adds a nice flavor to the beer. Lime is the only thing that works in terms of flavor. Up at college, a bartender ran out of limes and put a lemon in instead. That was a big mistake. It’s not really piss-water in my opinion. I drink a fairly wide variety of beers, typically nothing darker than Smithwick’s, and I find that Corona is an excellent beer on a hot day or when you absolutely can’t have a heavy beer weighing you down. If you’re in a cold climate, or in an environment that is anything but tropical, then you’re more likely to avoid a Corona.

  6. “started when a bartender realized a slice of lime would keep the flies from landing on his bottle.”

    not a fact.

  7. We found what looked like a finger or chinken wing in bottle, Have held on to it for about three months and now its discenegrating .but what i was wondering if any one else has found things in there bottles.

  8. I recently bought a 12 pack of Corona at a local grocery and when I got it home a few days later I found that 3 bottles out of the 12 had crimped lids that did not cover the tops of the bottles and within a day or two smelled awful and looked awful(cloudy). I have been searching for weeks to find a customer service dept. where I could complain as I Love Corona at the end of a long day and I feel cheated since 3 bottles were not drinkable. It’s next to impossible to find a website for complaints as there are so many. I have never had this problem before but I also purchased a 12 pack of Pepsi a few weeks ago and 4 of the cans were half full but sealed. Where is quality control and customer service these days? It’s bad enough that things cost so much today and then you don’t get what you pay for.
    Annette

  9. Hey, Annette, it’s probably all bottled in China!!! By 5 year olds! With a hammer and a block of wood!
    Corona just wants you to FEEL like you’re all relaxed and beautiful on the beach when you drink their product! Like Nike’s make you run fast!
    Just don’t fall off the front porch of your trailer swatting the flies off your fat rolls. When I close my eyes and drink Corona’s I forget I’m fat and I look good to everybody!

  10. I will immediately grab your rss as I can’t to find your email subscription link or newsletter service. Do you’ve any?
    Kindly permit me understand so that I may just subscribe.

    Thanks.

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