I know it seemed like a good idea when you got married. I know you believed all that “for better or for worse” drivel. I know your really thought you were going to be with that one person forever.
The reality of it is that about 50% of the time your are not, so before you go doing something stupid like changing your name when you get married, just stop. Stop and don’t. Changing your name is a pain in the butt. Hundreds of forms, red tape, annoyances, money. Everything important in your life is on a form somewhere. You will hate it. Then when your marriage doesn’t work out, you’ll have to do all of it over again at a time when you are probably the most miserable.
Nevertheless, this complaint isn’t written in the spirit of helping you. I mean, you got married and it didn’t work out. It’s not our fault, right? Yet we are the ones who have to try to keep track of what exactly we are supposed to call you. Some people get married and divorced so fast that I barely have a chance to change my address books.
Instead why don’t you consider this. Get married but don’t change your name until you see if the marriage is actually going to take hold. Give it 5 or 10 years, then if it seems right, go for it. Clearly this isn’t a perfect system, but at least it will save everybody a lot of hassle.