When I’m ogling a hot rare sports car and notice a huge scratch in the paint job, I make a certain facial expression impulsively. If you ever catch me making that face, you’ll be able to note the disappointment and the encroaching nausea. I make the same face when I see a hot chick suffering from a bad cellulite situation.
This really attractive woman at my job is always talking about how she stays in shape and so on. As far as I could tell, she was right. She looked great in her day to day work attire. I even saw her in those black spandex “f:)k me” pants and she was looking pretty hot in those too. Recently I caught her wearing some Daisy Duke shorts and the fantasy is OVER. Her thighs vibrated the way my rear-view mirror does when i have the bass turned up loud and I’m bumping some Hieroglyphics. The kind of vibrations that can only occur in a thigh crammed with cellulite.
Those wrinkly dimples shook me to the core and may have scarred me for life. The funny thing is that her flirtatious nature toward me (and all other guys my age in the office) is now completely ineffective. I can hardly consider her a sexual being anymore. Is this what it feels like to be an old man who can’t get it up anymore? I imagine an old man must feel satisfied at times that women no longer have any power over his body.
I suppose my biggest complaint about Cellulite is that it exists at all. It really serves to distinguish age and health of women but I can only imagine how many other hot women out there are hiding their dimpled thighs from me. If I find myself in too deep when I discover a chick has cellulite, will I react as similarly?