When I’m ogling a hot rare sports car and notice a huge scratch in the paint job, I make a certain facial expression impulsively. If you ever catch me making that face, you’ll be able to note the disappointment and the encroaching nausea. I make the same face when I see a hot chick suffering from a bad cellulite situation.
This really attractive woman at my job is always talking about how she stays in shape and so on. As far as I could tell, she was right. She looked great in her day to day work attire. I even saw her in those black spandex “f:)k me” pants and she was looking pretty hot in those too. Recently I caught her wearing some Daisy Duke shorts and the fantasy is OVER. Her thighs vibrated the way my rear-view mirror does when i have the bass turned up loud and I’m bumping some Hieroglyphics. The kind of vibrations that can only occur in a thigh crammed with cellulite.
Those wrinkly dimples shook me to the core and may have scarred me for life. The funny thing is that her flirtatious nature toward me (and all other guys my age in the office) is now completely ineffective. I can hardly consider her a sexual being anymore. Is this what it feels like to be an old man who can’t get it up anymore? I imagine an old man must feel satisfied at times that women no longer have any power over his body.
I suppose my biggest complaint about Cellulite is that it exists at all. It really serves to distinguish age and health of women but I can only imagine how many other hot women out there are hiding their dimpled thighs from me. If I find myself in too deep when I discover a chick has cellulite, will I react as similarly?
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Unfortunately for you, 90% of women (even the skinny ones) have cellulite. It’s a situation you’re likely to encounter, so just get over it, we all can’t look as perfect as you.
j on October 23rd, 2007 at 5:03 pm | Link
I am 25 and I weigh 115 pounds. I am not “hot” by any means but consider myself “attractive”. Despite my congratulations to you for using your freedom of speech opportunity, I am disgusted by your idea of what a woman should look like. I have cellulite, it happens, just like wrinkles or body odor. I commend you for having standards because alot of people don’t, but maybe you might consider having a heart because people like you make teenage girls vommit after every meal they eat so they don’t get cottage cheese thighs!
a woman on December 16th, 2007 at 7:42 pm | Link
I only date girls if I can see their ribs.
Okay, so enjoy your Saturday nights with a magazine. Women are real people , healthy women have some fat,to protect a fetus if the mother couln’t eat for some reason . I really don’t know how old you are , but honestly your comments make you seem like a 13 or 14 year old. You need to stay away from the dating scene until you mature a little.
Sharon on December 28th, 2007 at 7:43 am | Link
ha, you’re all fatties.
Unfortunately, it is true - most women have cellulite somewhere, even if they are slender and athletic.No woman has the perfect body. Even those without cellulite may have stretch marks (not just from being overweight: if a woman grows too fast during her teen years, she can get them), loose skin, a strange birth mark in a random place, one breast being bigger than the other, or a multitude of other very minor physical imperfections.
Celebrities, models, and porn stars don’t appear to have cellulite because they live in the land of airbrushing, body wrapping, and plastic surgery. I’ve done modeling in the past and I have a photo shoot coming up - I can tell you right now that these models are no more perfect than the rest of us.
PS: I don’t have cottage cheese thighs. I have a 1″ or so gap between the highest parts of my thighs, muscle definition, and I also have a very flat stomach BUT I still have a tad bit of cellulite around my belly button area. I’m not perfect, but I have been told that I look like the short-haired Alyssa Milano except with blue/green eyes and while I wouldn’t be arrogant enough to call myself HOT, I am definitely not ugly. Even if my body was 100% completely perfect, I would be disgusted to date someone who would be completely unattracted to a woman just because of some cellulite!
I would accuse you of being a pig, but we all have our preferences… I could never date a fat person… and I guess you could never date a woman with cellulite (though in my opinion, asking for someone to simply not be overweight is a lot less shallow…)
Aidyn on January 23rd, 2008 at 2:52 pm | Link
PPS: despite my disagreeing, I admire your guts. This site is all about voicing your innermost complaints and I have to admit that I chuckled a tad bit reading it. I’m not much for being politically correct, so anything out-of-the-box and un PC gets my kudos.
Aidyn on January 23rd, 2008 at 3:01 pm | Link
even i have a little cellulite and im a size 6 chick that most guys with wekken at there knees when i walk by and the ones that have seen my naked have seen that i have a little bit of cellulite and stretch marks but none of them care some of them even say i have one of the best arses they have ever seen. iv been told by my boyfriend the omount of porn stars that have it but that is never shown in the world these days now that they have new technology you shouldnt feel any different about a chick just because she has a few imperfections.
miss sexy on February 11th, 2008 at 5:14 pm | Link
miss sexy, can you show some pics of you sexy size 6 imperfect body so we can be the judge?
men are morons… you judgemental idiots probably have small packages and gotta make all the “hot” biatches that you think don’t have cellulite like you til they find out you have teeny weenies! Jeez, Paris Hilton has cellulite, do you not like her anymore. Photo editing is awesome and you men are stupid
Lindsay on March 2nd, 2008 at 11:44 pm | Link
Ok listen up. Alot of people have cellulite it can’t be helped even the skinny girls, so you need to stop being so immature about it. Not everyone can be as ‘perfect’ as you. And you shouldn’t even judge people on their appearances.
Elizabeth on May 2nd, 2008 at 4:34 pm | Link
LMAOOOOOOOOO Wow…Cellulite? First of all, I REALLY hope you have a body like L.L. Cool J while your sitting here on this posting sharing your disgust with cellulite…LOL. Ladies, ever noticed that its always the LAMEST, NOT HOT guys that try to have the “highest” so-called standards? Kind of like Shallow Hal….LMAO….if a woman with cellulite isn’t attractive to you and so many women seem to have it, have you considered maybe…umm..a blow up doll? LOL
Shawnee on August 24th, 2008 at 7:05 am | Link